Friday, 9 April 2010

In the beginning

Well it's been a long time since I've blogged so there's a lot to catch up on.
Here we go.......

After a long time of trying I finally fell pregnant in October 2009 and was overjoyed, OK I was still Fat Girl Thin but other than that I had no real complications with my pregnancy until the fateful night of 29th March 2010.

My pregnancy had gone fine and I was looking forward to decorating both mine and my future child’s bedrooms when suddenly I was rushed into hospital at 32 weeks. I wasn't due for another 8 weeks, not till the end of May, crikey, surely nothing serious was wrong, I hadn't even bought a cot yet!
I spent the rest of the night hooked up to a fetal heart monitor, drifting in and out of consciousness, the nurses decided to send my husband home for some rest of his own and no sooner had he gone they rushed me into theatre! I’d got a ruptured placenta and both mine and the baby’s lives were in danger. The last words I remember was the nurse telling me she was going to put a catheter in and then an uncomfortable feeling before darkness.

I don’t remember much of the next few days because I was so doped up on morphine, but I can remember every time the nurse came in to check on me she’d give me another shot of the stuff, maybe she was on commission from her dealer to push as much of the stuff through me as possible – we may never know.

I did come around 3 days later, long enough to be wheeled into NICU to see my new born child and to find out that I'd had a son, 3lbs 11 ounces. I could only stay a while because I was in so much pain and needed to get back to bed. After a few more days on the birthing unit, they decided that I should be moved onto the regular maternity unit and along came a big butch nurse to remove my drain and catheter, "this won’t hurt…… much" she said as she smiled pulling the tubes out of me. OK I aint no lady and have been known to say a few choice words at times but even I surprised myself that morning with what came out of my mouth!, they obviously don’t adhere to the “ violence and abuse against staff “ posters that are put around the hospital, because I should have been thrown out after what I called her!

To get her own back, instead of allowing me to go to the new ward in a wheelchair, she made me walk along the corridor, get in a lift and walk along another corridor to my new room. Part of the rehabilitation process she called it. This was where the fun really started. Major incontinence. Due to having a catheter it can take a while for the bladder to start working properly again, and being pumped full of antibiotics can cause bowel incontinence. I had to change rooms to one that had an en suite bathroom because I kept making such a mess, and was put on barrier nursing because my temperature wouldn't go down and I had suspected MRSA. I was shitting myself too much for it not to be caused by an infection. So all my family had to now kit up before coming to see me. It's not easy trying to hug and love someone when you have to wear an apron, gloves and masks, - All I wanted was a hug, cuddle and a kiss to reassure me things would get better but nobody could give that to me.Not once did any of the doctors seem concerned that I  couldn't go and see my son again nor the fact that I looked more pregnant than when I was! My stomach was swollen to twice its normal size, I was leaking ooze out of my c-section wound but this wasn't a problem, they just kept changing the dressings.

Strangely one day I was being barrier nursed and then the next I was ready to leave hospital and discharged, and my son was transferred to my nearest hospital so that I could possibly visit him now I was going home....... how was I to know this was the last time I would see my tiny little baby - no he didn't die - but I nearly did...again!
To Be Continued...............

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